Like double cherry pie..

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Just wanted to do a quick look of the day. I’m feeling a bit better about my shadow pics and wanted to get out my Lola Tango’s and play a bit with some clothing. I found this top with appliers from Gawk! at the Boobie Show, first time that I was there today. I’d like to find more sexy but not completely slut-a-rific tops like this to wear with my Lola’s. So far Gawk! seems like a very good option.

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I paired it with this newer hair that I think I’ve worn before from Truth, Amberly skin from Glam Affair #7, The oxford skirt from Montissu and heels from Celoe. My poses are from Adorkable. That is my look of the day!

The female of the species..

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So a few things have come to my attention, and I shall bring them to your attention too! First off the poses in this post are from Exposeur’s advent pack, if you missed this they are at the main store under the tree in gift boxes for really really cheap. There are a bunch of poses in the box if you missed the advent gifts and you need new poses, this is an amazing value.

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Speaking of an amazing value.. the skin that I’m wearing in the post is a new group gift from Izzie’s. If you are in the group go and grab it, if not it’s only 250L to join and she gives out wonderful group gifts every month, way worth the value. I am also wearing (brand new from Fameshed) this sweater and pants combo from Rebel Hope, which I found to be adorable so I had to pick it up and my hair is from Truth, and my heels are from N-core. Happy shopping!

Penguins Mate for Life

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I really love this sweater that comes to us from Auxiliary that is now at the new round of Fameshed. You get three tones of this sweatshirt and there are a few other very cute styles for one price. Good deal!

I sort of built what I was wearing around this sweatshirt and this is what I came up with. I started with these cargo pants from Miel and was happy with the way the Gos Triumph boots seemed made for these pants.

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I wanted some new hair so I went and picked this style up at Burley along with these cute glasses. The necklace that I am wearing is from Maxi Gossamer and you still have a couple of days to get it at Collabor88.

May your New Year be awesome!

Happy New Year!

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Well It’s 2013 today, what are your New Years resolutions? Me I don’t have any yet other than losing weight but that will probably change in the next few days.

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In case you didn’t know, Truth has sent out this hair as a gift it includes a detachable 2013 sign and it is an awesome hair in many colors, a very generous group gift, thank you Mr. Hawks <3. Also I got this bed at the Apple Fall 50% off sale on everything in the store! I’m not sure how long it will last so get over there asap.

I am also wearing lingerie from Onyx Wear, and Amberly skin from Glam Affair and eyes from Ikon. My poses are from Bounce This! by Bouncer Criss. My feet are from Slink.

Running into a New Year

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i am running into a new year
and the old years blow back
like a wind
that i catch in my hair
like strong fingers like
all my old promises and
it will be hard to let go
of what I said to myself
about myself
when i was sixteen
and twentysix and thirtysix
even thirtysix but
i am running into a new year
and i beg what i love and
i leave to forgive me

Written by: Lucille Clifton

This poem just strikes a cord so deep.
Lets make this next year one of the best!

Credits:
Pose Stool: Diesel Works @ Zodiac
Hair: Truth
Skin: Al Vulo - Jade
Eyes: Ikon
Jewelry: Cae - Enchanted
Dress: Cynful
Shoes: N Core

Concerned Bloggers – Suicide Awareness w/Possible Trigger warning

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It’s another month, and another Concerned Bloggers topic. This month it’s Suicide Awareness. It’s not a light hearted topic and instead of weighing you down with facts or general advice (which you can find here – this website does a much better job: http://www.save.org/) I’ll give you a bit of a story of my own struggle with it.

The stuff below could be potential trigger warnings so please proceed with that in mind.

Ever since I can remember I’ve been dealing with depression and thoughts of suicide. There was that time in the Six Grade where I ate a bunch of things in my grandmothers medicine cabinet thinking that’s all it would take but luckily most of the things were vitamin and aspirin. In my teens and some of my twenties there was cutting, and other self harm things, which graduated to my first really serious attempt in December of 2005.

Things piled up on me one day in ways that I can look back and think are stupid now. It was really snowy that day and there were many reasons piling up on me that led me to that point but I remember not feeling like myself that day and I got up and packed a backpack not sure of where I was going to go and I rode the bus around not wanting to go home.

I stopped at a store and bought some Vodka and razor blades and I went and rented a hotel room with a large Jacuzzi.. only I had planned on using that room as my way to escape my life. I started to get drunk, really really drunk and I ran the water in this large tub and well my phone rang.. and it was my mom.

It freaked me out that she would call at that moment and I don’t remember what I said to her but she kept calling me and I didn’t know it but she called my friends and so I turned off my phone and got in the tub and started the cutting when I heard my friends banging down the door saying that they were going to get the cops if I didn’t open up, so after awhile I let them in.

They were obviously upset but thankful that I was alive and well after that they took me to the hospital where I spent the week before Christmas trying to get better. When I got out I didn’t feel any better but I was thankful for my friends and I made a few attempts to try and turn things around but It took two more attempts and being in the hospital two more times before it did.

Now I’m medicated for my depression and going to see a psychiatrist and therapist regularly and for the most part there is no wish to harm myself. I realize for the most part I was looking for someone else s attention, only I didn’t use my voice and say “Hey I need you, come over”

If you ever feel like you need to hurt yourself tell someone. If you don’t have anyone to tell – IM me in world if you want to talk about any of this – I wont judge you and I can keep a secret.

Point is if you feel this way, tell someone. The most recent attempt that I made was almost four years ago and it could have been fatal, I almost didn’t get a second chance, but seriously each moment with people that you love is a gift, and I am a survivor of myself for everything that I’ve put myself through.

It’s a new year, make it count.